I have written in an earlier post that my School Leadership Team is completing a book study on Teaching with Love and Logic. As I read over my notes, I found myself reliving some personal experiences from my childhood that could have gone much better had my teachers utilized the four key principles of love and logic. I was in fifth grade and looked up to my sister in the seventh grade. She was working on an art project that involved her creating a marionette. I copied her and made my own version, with my parent's help. I took it to school and was showing it at lunch to my friends. One of the parent volunteers walked by and commented, "That's the ugliest thing I have ever seen, put it away." I did and never completed the project. For years I professed to lack creativity and artistic skills. This woman, with her one comment, crushed my self concept for many years.
How can we help maintain and even build a child's self concept? There needs to be careful balance of helping he child see what his strengths are and not make him arrogant and helping the child identify weaknesses without making him feel inferior.
I find that many teachers are control freaks. Teachers invariably establish rules and expectations that involve doing exactly what the teacher tells the students and not questioning the teacher. Many parents struggle with the same problem and use the easily quoted, "Because I said so." How many times did you hear that as a child? Many times students misunderstand and teachers misrepresent a point and conflict or a struggle over control ensues. Ultimatums are often a precursor to power struggles. When given an ultimatum, the giver and receiver have no options.
How can teachers recognize the beginnings of a power struggle; share control with the students; still maintain effective instruction; and build trust between her and the students?
There are many times that teachers need to have empathy for her students. This can be hard if she can't put herself in the student's place. Over the years of my career, I have made home visits in an effort to see where my students came from each day. I encourage my staff to do the same. I don't experience the conditions but I gain perspective. I have also experienced my share of chronic health issues which has helped me be empathetic to students and staff that suffer with their own chronic health issues. My own experiences open my eyes to more effective approaches to communicating my expectations. The student or staff member still needs to meet the expectation but they have been communicated with in a way that is compassionate.
Explain why you think it is or isn't fair to administer consequences when you are angry; haven't investigated the entire incident; or your intent is punishment and not changed behavior.
Shared thinking looks good on paper but how much time does shared thinking with questioning techniques take away from instruction? Read the "pearl" on page 190 ("Students need to learn to think. By giving them practice at thinking, teachers not only gain control over the classroom but also model the joy of relearning." ) and respond to how this pearl can address my question at the start of this paragraph.
Teaching styles are just that, styles. It is hard to teach someone to have a certain style. Reflect on the three styles addressed in Chapter 12 and let me know which style you honestly think you have and which one do you wish to aspire to be and why.
In Chapter 13, the authors provide information that you may or may not have already known. Were there any surprises for you? Are you aware of the Kershaw County School District board policies? Do you know where to find them?
While you read over the
se comments and questions and reflect on the chapters you have read, try to envision sharing the concepts of Love and Logic with the staff.I recognize that there is not ONE way to do things and that many times we must take bits and pieces from many concepts and make it our own. I don't want you to fret over the conflict Love and Logic concepts may have with our school wide discipline plan or PBIS. In the end, we must do what is true to our profession and right for the children of our school community.
10 comments:
Consequences should allow us to LEARN from the decisions we make, whether good or bad. When we administer them while angry or before we have thoroughly investigated the situation at hand, we often defeat the intended “learning” that should occur. We respond with a “knee jerk” reaction and sometimes make the consequences too harsh or often they do not even pertain to the situation. Our purpose as parents and educators is to change behaviors and allow children to learn from their behaviors and hopefully not make the same mistakes again. By administering consequences fairly, calmly and with empathy, we allow children to grow and learn from their mistakes. It’s what we do with what we’ve learned from those mistakes that makes us grow.
As a Kindergarten teacher, I have the privilege and responsibility to teach five-year-olds to think for themselves. It always amazes me to see children who literally cannot think through the simplest challenge. Their parents choose their clothes, put on their shoes, brush their hair and teeth, choose their show and tell, and the list goes on…. In Kindergarten, we not only teach academics, but we also teach children to think of “why, what, who, where, when”. They are actually very smart and capable, but are all too often not given the chance to think. They are just pushed along and not allowed to explore and come to their own conclusions. As a teacher, it is my responsibility to take the time to foster their thinking skills. Yes, it may take time, but if we want competent, productive, responsible people, we must teach and encourage children to think for themselves. In the long run, we will all benefit!
I think the “Drill Sergeants” passage was a little harsh! I do not agree with the statement, “Drill sergeant teachers give kids the unstated message, ‘You have low personal worth. You are a burden, if not an out-and-out irritant.” In saying this, I do see myself as a drill sergeant some times, but in no way do I agree with or portray the message that my students are burdens or irritants! I do expect them to follow instructions and behave in the classroom, but I truly love them and want the best for them. I see myself as more of the consultant. Of course, there are always things to learn and I see many of the traits of the consultant that I need to improve on and hopefully I will soon be able to say that I am not in any way a Drill Sergeant!!!
I was surprised by the comment that students have more rights than teachers, who are considered agents of the state. I do not understand the term “due process”. I was also surprised at the definition of “handicap” in the case of 504 on page 243. The author states that without parameters, the list could include a significant number of students in a regular classroom. Honestly, I do not remember the KCSD policies. I read them prior to employment, but I haven’t looked at them since. I would like to have more information/training on the legal considerations for teachers, maybe an in-service or Tool Box Monday presentation?
- You can build a child's self concept without making him/her arrogant and help a child see his weaknesses without making him feel inferior by using positive, fair words that don't over exaggerate. Praising a child when they are doing well or putting forth effort is motivating.
- Power struggles usually become evident very early in the school year, often within the first days of school. Avoiding a power struggle can be as simple as asking for a child's opinion. Even if you don't use the idea, students feel respected when we listen to their ideas.
- If you have a clear set of consequences spelled out for students before the bad behavior occurs, you don't have to worry about unfairly reprimanding a student when angry.
- To be honest, I haven't read any school district policy manuals since I was hired. I imagine that all of the information is available on the school district web site since they stopped handing out the booklets every year. I found the term "educational malpractice" to be interesting. I wonder if there will come a time when someone could sue a school district/school/teacher for malpractice in the same way that a patient can sue a doctor for malpractice.
Recognizing a power struggle requires us to be attentive to a student's tone and volume of voice, their body language and their reactions to the teacher as well as other students. We must take the time to let them be heard and model calm discussion. Be proactive rather than reactive. When we must administer consequences I think even teachers can use a "time out" to gather ourselves so that our emotions are not involved. The goal is to change the behavior.
After reading chapter 12 I see myself in two of the three teaching styles described. I am a helicopter in that I tend to take on some of the students' responsibilities and decision-making mainly because it is less time consuming. I did not realize I was sending negative messages to students about their abilities to do these things on their own. I aspire to be a TOTAL consultant style teacher. While I see myself in many of the elements that the author considers to be a consultant teacher, there are a couple or areas in which I know I could improve.
1. Inducing thinking through questions.
2. Allowing students more time to think through a problem.
I have come to realize I am "in a hurry" to teach academics without considering making my students self-reliant. Which brings me to the concept of shared thinking. I don't allow for this very much in my classroom and again,though it could be beneficial to students, I feel it is time consuming.
I would like to see a class or workshop offered in our district periodically in regards to legal considerations. I was aware of some of the things discussed, but I don't feel like I am well informed. Our district's board policies can be found on the KCSD website under the heading School Board and then Policy Manual, however deciphering the legal terminology that is used can be difficult.
Allowing children to exercise their autonomy by creating their own series of choices when disciplining is very empowering for them. This enhances and builds their self-concept. This methods not only gives students consequences for their behavior, but it also validates their thinking.
I often use the technique of encouraging my students to help one another to assist them in identifying their strengths and at the same time helping me out in the classroom. Every child can help with something, and I make sure my class knows that I NEED them to help one another. When it is a part of the environment of the class to be helpful, getting assistance with an area that is difficult is not embarrassing, it is expected.
It was a blessing that my first child came out of the womb obsessed with taking control of his life. I had to quickly learn the signs of passive as well as overt resistance for the sake of my own self-preservation.
Allowing the child to follow through with the choice sets the groundwork for trust, and will definitely be helpful with future interactions with the child. I heard somewhere that everybody, even children, have a "bank" of trust that other people can deposit into by showing trustworthiness, or withdraw from by disappointing a person. Being empathetic and supportive through consequences is and effective way to "deposit" trust in the bank.
Reacting to offending behavior is unwise and can even be dangerous. Even the author admitted to hitting two students because of anger. I have learned over the years to tell the student the "We are going to have a conversation later about (fill in the blank) because you are having a hard time understanding me. We will have this conversation later because right now I am thinking of something really good to say to you." I never knew why, but it always stops the offending behavior, and gives me time to calm down. Reading this book is giving me an idea why it works.
Effective questioning techniques takes less time that ineffective questioning, and the desired result comes quicker.
I like to believe that my teaching style is that of consultant with a dash of helicopter and a tablespoon of drill sergeant. But my goal is to produce confident, self-sufficient learners that are excited about school.
Although I did not read any new information in chapter 13, it was good to be reminded of the legal aspects of education. I believe the district policies are supposed to be in every school handbook somewhere, but it has been a while since I have read them.
As an educational administrator, discipline is a major part of my job. There are times when students display behaviors that irritate you, but the key is to focusing on the negative behavior. My father has always advised me to never deal with a child, especially your own , when angry. It is better to wait and get calm. Although can be a very difficult task at times. When dealing with disciplinary actions, remain calm, get the whole story and not rush to judgment. Focus on ways the student can verbalize their own change of behavior for the future. Create a learning experience, rather than a punishment.
It was interesting to read about the different teaching styles. As a former Physical Education teacher, I can certainly relate to be a drill sergeant. I was told that many times during my teaching career. The kids enjoyed my class but I kept a tight schedule and didn't tolerate much non-sense in my gym. There were many times I used sarcasm with non conforming pupils. The heliocopter style was also utilized, especially with my lack of patience with students at times. It was just as easy to show them the correct way rather than allow them to think the problem out for themselves.Looking back, I wish I had allowed for more self discovery. The consultant style is the level I reached during my third year of teaching. By this time, I had a system, knew the students, and was better able to monitor and adjust my lessons and expectations. It was during my third year that I realized that I wanted to be a educator, I found my niche. Those Physical Education experiences, lead me to aspire to be an administrator.
In regards to the pearl reference; I honestly believe it is our job as educators to produce life long learners by encouraging them to think for themselves. I think all too often, we become impatient with students and just want to get on with a particular lesson, so we give the answer. What kind of message are we sending to our students if we give up on them too easy and supply the answer. We need to do a better job of this and it appears that we as educators have a long way to go.
As an administrator, I'm very familiar with board policies, 504, IEP, and personnel matters.
* It is not fair to administer consequences to students when you are angry, haven't investigated, or when your intent is simply punishment. This is wrong in so many ways. If students are confronted with anger, the hurt they feel from making a mistake will often surface as anger also. This will likely cause a confrontation and conflict. When you are angry, you don't think clearly and may feel like simply punishing instead of issuing a consequence that teaches an appropriate lesson.
* Shared thinking, if applied correctly, should take away little to no instructional time. As good teachers, we should constantly be incorporating opportunities for students to think each day-- throughout the day. As the "pearl" states, students must "learn to think" and it's our job to help teach this skill to our students. Some ways we can teach "thinking skills" during instructional time is offering choices with assignments, allowing for small and whole group discussions, using peer tutoring, and asking questions high up on Bloom's taxonomy.
* I like to think that I have the consultant teaching style more so than the others. After ten years of teaching- and lots of trial and error- I feel as if I've developed into the consultant style. In the past, I may sometimes have exhibited the drill sergeant tendencies but have grown from those mistakes. I continue to aspire to be a better teacher, and to employ more of the strategies mentioned in Love and Logic.
* There wasn't anything in Chapter 13 that necessarily surprised me, but it certainly saddened, and even infuriated, me. I, too, have long believed the "naive" idea mentioned in the book that as long as "educators are doing what is best for kids" they will be safe legally. Fortunately, I've worked with several administrators that remind teachers of legal liabilities and offer advice on how to stay protected, such as "document, document, document.” It saddens me to know that in our world it's now very common to simply take legal action against someone, rather than trying to find another solution. The Board policies are available for anyone to view online. Most sections were adopted in 1997. Fortunately, the Student and School-Community-Home sections were last revised in 2007, to keep up with the changing times.
Lisa, I like the part in your blog that said shared thinking looks good on paper but how much time does shared thinking with questioning techniques take away from instruction? By giving them practice at thinking, teachers not only gain control over the classroom but also model the joy of relearning." Although I'm not in a classroom teaching but seeing children come into the front office (some as mad as fire). Who could have made them so mad that their behavior will affect their chances of doing an activity, minutes off their recess? I was just thinking about if I was a teacher and I had a behavior child in my class I would try to pick out one thing each day that you notice about the student. I notice you got 100% on your math test. I notice you are smiling this morning, after a couple of days, they may engage you in conversation about the things you have noticed. It makes the tough kids come around to be on your side. They may realize that you are taking the time to notice them, not their behavior or their struggles in the classroom, so when you need to ask them to do something for you, they may be more apt to cooperate.
~In requards to administering consequences, I think fairness is the key. I know there have been several times in my classroom where I have reacted in anger. The look on a child's face will really set you back to reality. It is so easy to scar a child with one little word or action. I think when you react fairly and calmly it creates a trustworthy feeling with the child.
I can remember when I was in induction a teacher telling me about how they were scolding a child for a behavior. She did not realize that the mother of the child was standing right behind her. As she realized what had taken place, the teacher was so embarrassed for the way she had reacted. Not only that, she had some explaining to do with her behaviors. I always try to keep that in mind. WOuld I talk to a child that way if the parent were standing there, and in the same sense, would I want a teacher talking to my child that way? I try to never say something that you can not take back. I want to make a positive impression, not a scar.
~ As for teaching style....I am most NOT like the drill sergeant. I can not be drill and hard on children. IF anything I am tool loose. I want my children to learn and have fun! My goal is to create life long learners. I want them to remember me as someone who made a positive impression on their life.
~ I learned a few of the board policies when I took the mentoring class. As to the exact, I don't know them....or where to find them. I guess if I had any type of question or concern, I would email John Gardner.
Having raised teenagers, I have experienced power struggles personally. What comes to mind is my son's rough years. The more my husband said, "You will. . ."--the more he did NOT. I learned a lot by watching those two interact. I intervened with a more positive approach. He felt more comfortable on my playing field and complied more readily. Eventually, we survived and he matured as well. Power struggles are not productive. My grandmother was right, "you can catch more flies with honey than with vinegar."
I remember as a child my self-esteem was low. My parents divorced when divorce was not a common occurrence. My mom did not drive and we did not have a car. I had a mentally disabled sister. My family unit appeared quite different to many. Some children were not allowed to play with me due to all of these particulars. The prinicpal at my elementary school recognized that these things were affecting my educational performance and social skills. Therefore, she gave me responsibilities. I became a safety patrol and a leader for special occasions. She discovered that I had some artistic abilities and put me in charge of the library bullentin board.
I was not combative, however I was withdrawn and not as productive. The positive nurturing and increased expectations may have redirected or prevented any negativity that could have developed.
With my past experiences and The Four Key Priniples of Love and Logic, I hope I can continue to develop better communication skills for my students. Maybe I can maintain or even build a child's self concept and "pass it on."
I think the best I have ever seen or heard for dealing with "fairness" in using consequences was a teacher who would let students know that fair does not mean the same. Each situation and each child is different. I think that we need to remember that each situation is different as well. We, as educators or adults, tend to respond based on what we think we know. We can make ourselves slow down and know that, even though some children are "always" involved, we still need them to know we are listening and taking points of view and facts into consideration. I try to make sure students know how to handle small situations without teacher intervention. We do this through honest conversations.
I think every teacher is an individual and, as such, have their own ways of making children know they are valued and should have a good self concept. I have found that being open and honest with students helps. I try to create an atmosphere that allows for mistakes and wrong answers as learning points. I feel like this allows each student to see that mistakes happen and wrong answers can be corrected. I also try to make a point to have the child correct their own mistakes to help them see it is not out of low intelligence or lack or abilities. By creating this environment, students are not affraid to ask questions and, even better, answer questions.
I do agree with Donna that the passage on drill sargeants was a bit harsh. There are times when we need to step into a new teaching persona. Some children need us to deliver messages in ways that work for them and not for us. I do not like that style myself, but have had to use it before. I think we need to be aware of the benefits of alternative thought processes in all that we do!
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