Two of my children have graduated from high school and started a college career only to drop out of their college. They both are very bright and capable of doing anything they want to do. I see their strengths and talents and want to push them into a field where they can use those. However, I can't do that. I must sit back and wait for them to discover their own purpose and then follow it.
Having the two college aged children back home has also changed the dynamics of our home. They are used to setting their own schedules and doing their own thing and being accountable to no one. They have had a rude awakening from us-our house, our rules. Not an easy pill for an 18 and 20 year old to swallow.
Lavoy and I can remind the two of them to look for a job and gather information about the local community college so they can take some core classes, but we both work and can't hold their hands through the process. When we ask them how the day went, they roll their eyes, complain that we are nagging them and state they had no luck finding a job.
I want my children to be independent and be able to make decisions for themselves. Right now I am torn because they are living under our roof, eating our groceries, charging movies on demand to our cable and contribute very little to the household.
I find myself being an enabler to their behaviors and cringe at the thought because I often judged parents that enabled their children.
What do I do about this conundrum? I love my children and want to support their decisions. I am frustrated because I am a decisive person. I know what I think, believe and want and always have. It is difficult for me to sit back and watch my children waffle about their education and future.
Alas, I must have faith. God tells us in the Bible in Proverbs that if we "Train up a child in the way he should go, Even when he is old he will not depart from it."
No one can prepare you for the love you will have for these precious beings that come into your world totally dependent on you or for the trials you will face in raising them.
I will remain faithful and cling to scripture in Hebrews 12:
1 Therefore, since we have so great a cloud of witnesses surrounding us, let us also lay aside every encumbrance and the sin which so easily entangles us, and let us run with endurance the race that is set before us, 2 fixing our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of faith, who for the joy set before Him endured the cross, despising the shame, and has sat down at the right hand of the throne of God.
3 For consider Him who has endured such hostility by sinners against Himself, so that you will not grow weary and lose heart.
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